What is the problem????

There's such a difference between wanting something and actually DOING something. I haven't started WW yet.
Why?
I have no idea what is holding me back. Other than my thinking.

Here's my excuses:

Not the right food to diet with. I missing a can of white beans. As soon as I get the can of white beans I can make the WW white bean salad and then everything will be perfect. I will start then. Analyzing my thinking (with the entire help of FLylady) I have realized my whole life is surrounded by stinking thinking. Everything I do. I defeat myself no matter what I do, but especially dieting. If I can't do it perfectly, then why bother. I f the conditions aren't perfect, why waste my time trying. If I don't have exactly the right ingredients for the perfect recipies, why try. I will just fail, (or so my mind tells me)I guess this would be directly linked to my parents telling me, If you are not going to do it right the first time, don't bother doing it at all.
Holy crap. ( not blaming my parents for anything, I love them heaps and they did a great job)

What time I am wasting always trying to make EVERYTHING pefect. from my house to my kids birthdays.

The mind is an amazing organ. It's no wonder I battle depression. I need to stop thinking about things so wholly. Break them down. Life is not all about one big picture. It is made of many little moments. Everyone has the same number of minutes in the day. How am I going to make each one count for something more than I have been.

I WANT my LIFE BACK. I want to be ME again. I KNOW that this is related to my weight and thinking. I WANT this I WANT it. I WANT it.

SO now it is time to put Bat to ball and get going.

NO MORE EXCUSES or NEGAVTIVE THINKING!

Thank god for Flylady. She has finally made me realize to not wait for it to be "perfect" to just give what I have got at the time.

SO thats my new philosophy. Jump in where I am. Her motto exactly. Even if I overeat, I will get over it and immediately go back to the plan. No MORE, I ate 5 cookies, I might as well eat the whole bag.


What will I do today:

Track all food eaten.

Make a menu for the week.

Excersize for 20 minutes. (walking)

Keep remembering that trying my best is good enough for today.


Have a great day!!!!